A Mirror for Homemakers

This entry is part 18 of 40 in the series Hope for Homemakers


OK, so I fell out of habit yesterday a little bit and had to tackle a sink full of dishes and some heavier sweeping than normal (also we had a toddler who didn’t want to keep the latest sensory bin material in the sensory bin), but I got right back on that horse and rode today.  Got it all done and feel great about it.

Today, inspired by Dana White’s 28 Days to Hope for Your Home (affiliate link) entry for Day 17, I am going to talk about something a little controversial.  I welcome the discussion if you totally disagree with me and think I am crazy, but hear me out.

In the entry today, Dana talks about the frustration many of us homemakers feel when we work so hard to get it all done and not only is it not noticed, but no one in the house gets the hint and starts picking up after themselves.  She is specifically speaking of her kids (I think) and wanting (of course) to teach them to be clean and neat, to pick up after themselves.  But she reminds us that we are just starting out on this journey

Ummm, remember what it looked like on Day Fifteen?  That’s what they think a bathroom is supposed to look like.  They think you’re okay with that, because you were.

AND we should not wait to clean until later (when we can instruct and cajole them into cleaning up after themselves) because that is what we have been doing to get our homes so out-of-order: WAITING!  Procrastination (and laziness, too) has been the biggest contributor to our frustration as homemakers.

But I love the implication present in Dana’s instructions to us “Do it yourself.”  Present in that statement is the idea that we have to start with ourselves.  If we want our homes to be a place of hope, we must be proactive, we must take action and do it in the moment.   We can always help the others in our homes to learn to do and how to do the tasks we are making habits, but we have to do them first ourselves!

And although I think Dana is talking mostly about her kids in regards to cleaning, I know I am often tempted to get frustrated with my husband in the same area.  I kind of find myself thinking I need help around here, forgetting that my role is the helper to my husband.  He is not my helper and he is not my charge.  And I believe God has blessed me with the opportunity to help him by making our home a haven for him at the end of the day, not a place where he checks in to get a list of honey-dos and constant nagging to keep things picked up.  I can gladly, as his helper, pick up after him, wash his dishes, and do his laundry.  When I am doing these things I have the opportunity to serve him rather than supervise him.  I have the opportunity to help him rather than hound him.  I have the opportunity to bless him.

So, as you are checking that bathroom for clutter today, take a look in the mirror and see if the frustration you have with your home (or even those in your home) could be fixed by working on the person staring back at you.  And then go wash your dishes!  🙂

What do you think?  Do you get frustrated with the others in your home not picking up after themselves?  Have you been wondering when we were going to get to the part where we teach others to do this for us?

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This Post Has 3 Comments

  1. Linda

    “Procrastination (and laziness, too) has been the biggest contributor to our frustration as homemakers.”

    This is me to a T. I’ve let things slide for so long that it seems nearly impossible to ever recover my home back to normal. It is very depressing to be so far behind. But I know I have to start where I am, and try to keep the momentum going without losing hope.

    I’m still in the first part of this challenge, the dishes. I haven’t caught up yet. Lots of backlog to process but I am making progress. Its so hard to make myself do them every day!! I am my own worst enemy. I know by not doing the dishes every day, it just gets worse, but at the time I tell myself it doesn’t matter.

    Just needed to vent here. I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels like a domestic flop!! I have hope that I’ll get the hang of this sooner or later. In the meantime, I appreciate the encouragement found here.

    1. ussleah

      Hi Linda! I am so glad you “vented” here! I am also glad to hear that you have not given up hope and given up on the challenge. It is not impossible to get your home back in order. These habits we are forming in this 28 Days to Hope Challenge are truly the basics, but they do help to get everything back on track. Don’t worry about yesterday and the “failures” it held…move forward today in grace and you can get it done! If you haven’t picked up the e-book yet, I really recommend it because it is chock full of encouragement and straight talk about feeling like a failure in the home! I will be praying for you, Linda!

    2. Paige

      Here’s a little mind-trick to help with washing those dishes regularly: take your extra plates/spoons and put them in a box. Leave only the things you need for one day (or one meal). Take the box to a friends house or some other extremely unhandy place.
      I literally had to do this. And it has been helpful in motivating me to wash the dishes regularly, even if it is right before I need them for the next meal! 🙂
      You could also pack up any extra mixing bowls, etc.

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